Tuesday, January 30, 2007
12 days to go!
Oh no -12 days to go until I'm 30! It's the end of the world!! I don't want to be 30. That's middle-aged. People talk about 40 being the big age to hit, over-the-hill and all that, but 30 is worse. I'll no longer be young. No longer able to go on an 18-30's holiday (not that I've ever had an urge to before). Being in your 20's sounds young, being in your 30's makes you sound like you should be married with a couple of kids. I'm still a kid myself!! And who'd be mad enough to marry me??
Mind you, I'm starting to feel the effects of getting older. The body isn't how it used to be. Ok, so that's probably down to being so unfit and overweight. It's a vicious circle! I don’t seem to have time to do anything other than eat. And I find myself snacking in between meals, as much out of boredom than anything. I need to do something about it, and find the motivation as well. Just finding the time is not enough.
Which leads on to work..............
Another popular theme in my blogs, and it’s going to rear its head again in today’s! I’ve never had a job where I love it so much one minute, then hate it the next. In all honesty I’d say its around 15% love, 80% hate, with a 5% in there for toilet and drink breaks! I don’t like how when things go wrong, it seems to be my fault all the time, but when things go well it seems to be down to my boss’s intervention. I’m still sick of being pulled in two directions and not knowing where my loyalties are supposed to be. I long for a new challenge – and preferably one in Mansfield. This job was meant to be everything I was dreaming of, but it’s turned out to be worse than what I’ve had before. More crap to deal with. More mind-numbingly boring reconciliations to do. Nothing exciting. And I never get the feeling I am achieving anything. I get watched over 9 hours a day, 5 days a week – my every move scrutinised and criticised. Today I even said that such close supervision was counter-productive because it makes me nervous and start to make mistakes, which defeats the objects – the supervision is supposed to be to make sure I’m not making mistakes. Another vicious circle!!
So, with a new opportunity coming up on the horizon, I guess I should take it with both hands. In fact, with each day that passes, it seems like a no-brainer. I’ve got to prove to the world, and more importantly to myself, that I can move up to the next level. It’s not going to be easy, but just think of the rewards! Still, in the back of my mind will be a niggling thought that I’m being somewhat disloyal. I seem to get driven further away with each passing day at work, but once I go, I will feel upset that I’ve walked away from a job before I’ve finished – and that’s not something I’ll look back on with a feeling of satisfaction – far from it.
Nige's "Final Thought"........
At the end of the day though, in 12 days time I’m going to be 30, like it or not. I’ve got to do what is best for me and me alone. I’m sure I’ll make the right choices in life. If there is one thing I have learnt it’s that you can’t live your life trying not to upset people, because at the end of the day you can’t please all of the people all of the time!
Mind you, I'm starting to feel the effects of getting older. The body isn't how it used to be. Ok, so that's probably down to being so unfit and overweight. It's a vicious circle! I don’t seem to have time to do anything other than eat. And I find myself snacking in between meals, as much out of boredom than anything. I need to do something about it, and find the motivation as well. Just finding the time is not enough.
Which leads on to work..............
Another popular theme in my blogs, and it’s going to rear its head again in today’s! I’ve never had a job where I love it so much one minute, then hate it the next. In all honesty I’d say its around 15% love, 80% hate, with a 5% in there for toilet and drink breaks! I don’t like how when things go wrong, it seems to be my fault all the time, but when things go well it seems to be down to my boss’s intervention. I’m still sick of being pulled in two directions and not knowing where my loyalties are supposed to be. I long for a new challenge – and preferably one in Mansfield. This job was meant to be everything I was dreaming of, but it’s turned out to be worse than what I’ve had before. More crap to deal with. More mind-numbingly boring reconciliations to do. Nothing exciting. And I never get the feeling I am achieving anything. I get watched over 9 hours a day, 5 days a week – my every move scrutinised and criticised. Today I even said that such close supervision was counter-productive because it makes me nervous and start to make mistakes, which defeats the objects – the supervision is supposed to be to make sure I’m not making mistakes. Another vicious circle!!
So, with a new opportunity coming up on the horizon, I guess I should take it with both hands. In fact, with each day that passes, it seems like a no-brainer. I’ve got to prove to the world, and more importantly to myself, that I can move up to the next level. It’s not going to be easy, but just think of the rewards! Still, in the back of my mind will be a niggling thought that I’m being somewhat disloyal. I seem to get driven further away with each passing day at work, but once I go, I will feel upset that I’ve walked away from a job before I’ve finished – and that’s not something I’ll look back on with a feeling of satisfaction – far from it.
Nige's "Final Thought"........
At the end of the day though, in 12 days time I’m going to be 30, like it or not. I’ve got to do what is best for me and me alone. I’m sure I’ll make the right choices in life. If there is one thing I have learnt it’s that you can’t live your life trying not to upset people, because at the end of the day you can’t please all of the people all of the time!
# posted by Nige @ 1/30/2007 07:59:00 pm 
